Brief thoughts: Forget them

"In spite of everything you've done for them, eventually they will hate you."

~Norman Osborne

     For the greater majority of our lives, each of us will continue to disappoint people. Some people just can't be pleased. With that being said, don't continue to waste your talents, energy, and efforts in vain trying to change the unchangeable. It's futile.

     Don't live for other's enjoyment; loneliness is a disease that affects every human being at some point in time, but it's temporary. With 7+ billion people in this world, the likelihood of not meeting someone who appreciates who and what you are is impossible. Most of us, including myself, forget this fact. We become consumed with wanting to fit in to society, or change who we are to fit the standards of others. This is a travesty, a desecration to originality and uniqueness. 

     Of course it's not easy, of course there are days when each of us want to throw in the towel, stare up into the heavens clenching our fists, and scream, I'm done! Imagine for a second if everyone did that, and how different the world would be. The irony is, there would be no differences. The world would be one blurred, dull, redundancy. Sounds fun, eh?

     Of course in your response would be, That's not relevant, why consider the impossible? Well, the fact remains is that EVERYONE feels that way, at least at some point, and yet even so, many of those people have got back on their feet, did the best them in spite of everyone else, and became something great. We are all different and special, and each of us has the power to achieve something great, regardless of your current situation or predicament. Focus on you, don't waste your breath with people that challenge you for the sake of challenging you. Battle that temporary loneliness every day, and know that patience is a virtue. Good things happen to those who wait, just be sure not to wait too long, because nothing happens if you sit and do nothing.

The Mix

Sweat trickles down his upper left brow as he stares in the mirror, his black and red Studio Beats Headset draped around his neck. This was the night, his time to shine. He inhaled and exhaled slowly, and then walked out of the restroom. His hands were wet and clammy, and twitched intermittently while he walked down the hall. He felt the Sonic milkshake he had drank hours prior start to churn in his stomach. What if he messed up? So many ways to screw up, and everyone would notice. After all, this wasn't concerto piano where little mistakes went unnoticed. He paused at the door, heard the roaring crowd just beyond it. *Gulp* Ok, breathe in.....breathe out.....breathe in........As he exhaled once more, he stepped through the door onto the stage. The last DJ was just finishing his final set, the crowd going crazy, jumping up and down. He felt his stomach churn again. Wow, he thought, How the hell am I going to follow up after THAT? Before he even knew what was happening, the crowd had broken into applause and cheers, and the DJ walked off the stage, hands held high and triumph. The MC picked up the mic. "Give it up one last time for Oliver Heldens!!!! Once again, the crowd roared, and the DJ disappeared behind the stage. As the crowd's cheers died down, the MC paused momentarily, glancing at the crowd, then back at the the other DJ. "We have something special for you tonight everyone, Performing his very first mix session at EDM Sub zero, hailing all the way from Seattle, Washington, please give it up for DJ SHAKA!!!!!!!" As the crowd roared back to life, the MC motioned to the DJ to step forward. DJ Shaka, staring transfixed at the tens of thousands of people, didn't notice. He wiped the sweat off his brow as the MC walked over and lightly nudged the jittery DJ toward the center stage. The DJ walked like a robot toward the MacBook sitting by the mixers. He slipped in his thumbdrive, and tentatively grabbed the mic from the mic stand. He stared at the crowd for a good 15 seconds, holding the mic. Inhale....exhale...."How are you doing tonight Atlanta?!!!" Once again the crowd erupted. "I may just be a nerd from Seattle, and this may be my first official mix session, but I , and that's exact have some sick stuff for you tonight, so enough chit chat. Let's TURNNN UPP ATLANTA!!!!"  As everyone pumped their fists and cheered, Shaka began his mix. He started with some light cymbal combos, then he added a low synth to carry the cymbals. He noticed people had begun head bobbing in the crowd, lifting their hands, nodding at him. He added a few fx for the buildup, then some classic stereo claps. Almost everyone was moving their bodies now, feeling the beat. The buildup continued, the claps quickening. He added another synth, observing the crowd. So far so good  he thought to himself. As the buildup approached its climax, DJ Shaka broke out into a sweat again. If he didn't hit this drop right, he could blow everything, in front of tens of thousands of people. He walked through the drop one last time in his head, then slowly but confidently adjusted a few things on the soundboard. 3....2......1.......Shaka dropped the bassline, subwoofer blaring, overlapping snyths reverbing around the building, Everyone was on their feet, jumping, head bobbing, yelling, sweating like maniacs as they danced like their life depended on it. Well, that was easier than I thought thought Shaka as he smiled to himself. He cupped one hand around his Studio Beats, stuck his fist in the air, yelling, "Let's GOOO Atlanta!!!


As his 45 minute mix session came to a close, DJ Shaka no longer felt anxious, but ecstatic. He had nailed his debut, and couldn't be happier. I wonder who's gonna follow me up. My mix is going to be hard to beat haha. No sooner had he thought that did the MC say "Now put your hands up for the final mix of the night, the people who all came to see, Dimitri Vegas and Like Mike!!!!!!!!! Umm...what??!!! Just then the duo themselves walked right up to DJ Shaka, hands prepared to fist bump him out of respect. "Mate, what a show, you KILLED it. I'm not sure if we can one up that, but we'll give it our best go won't we Mike? Haha" Stunned, mouth open, DJ Shaka watched as the two megastars walked up to the mixer to get ready. He looked as if he had just seen a ghost. Wow, um....ok then. He grabbed his hoodie and walked out, wearing a grin so large it could be seen a mile away.

Cocoon

Encased in a confined space,

My body immobile,

Beset by my worries, fears, and tears,

Creating the illusion of permanence,

But if only my paralyzed hands could

Reach and see its only paper.


The transparent walls surrounding me,

Reveal the world that awaits,

If only I could claw my way

Out of these unwavering paper confines,

But my mind has convinced me of the

Walls' permanence.


My fingers, buried in the cement layed

By my false pretenses and assumptions,

That cloud my mind with their nebulous

Haze, permeating through my pores like

Oil seeps through tissue paper,

I am my own biggest weakness.


But the cocoon enveloping me

Is not exempt from the coarse hands

Of time. Nothing is permanent, and I

Will squirm and flail until I burst through

The paper walls encasing me,



...into something beautiful.

If you could relive one day...

Have you ever thought about what it would be like to relive one day in your life, in the body you now have? Sorry, that's a stupid question. Of course you have--everyone has. The better question is what day in your life would it be and why?

I'm not quite exactly sure why this spontaneously came to mind. I had been thinking about my generation, the 90's kids. Our generation has lived in 3 different decades, two centuries, and two millenia. The only day I  would really want to relive, assuming I was in my current body, would be the simultaneous turn of the century and the millenium--New Years Eve, 1999.

We have all heard numerous references in line with "Let's party like it's 1999!" both in conversation and in music. Up until now however, I had never really thought about the fact that I was actually there, 5 years young, but there nonetheless. When one is at such a young age he/she doesn't really appreciate what the New Year means, aside from having to date papers with a new number for 365 days.

If only for the sheer spectacle, 4 number changes as opposed to one, the dawn of the 21st century, the new millennium, I would want to relive that day. In modern terms, the party would be LIT, and the after party would be one for the ages (literally). To be with others during this celebration, while the whole world, if only for a few hours, was at ease--it would be nothing short of spectacular, made even better with some free food and ice cold booze. I can't even imagine how much more fun 1999's New Year celebration would be in comparison with any other New Year party of the 21st Century.

A new fixation

It's been quite a while since I last posted a blog. Since that time, I've made it back to the UK and have resumed my studies this term. Today I just participated in my first ever radio show; although I was nervous at first, I feel like I was in my element.

It was rather nice having control over everything, from the content I discussed to the music I played. It took a little while for me to decide what my first show would be focused on. I decided to do my own spin on "Feel Good Friday" and did my own "Feel Good Wednesday". I just played a variety of "feel good songs", from the new running man song to the legendary Santana. Every now and then I would fade the music out to share a few words about the song or artist. I also briefly discussed the upcoming summer Olympics that will  be held in Rio starting in about a week.

In light of it being my first time on air, it was difficult for me to get comfortable at first. As the term progresses I look forward to creating my own comedic radio persona in the hopes of attracting more listeners. Naturally, I will also have to do a little self-advertising, if only for people around campus to even know my show exists.

With that being said, I am very excited moving forward in this. It's a wonderful feeling being able to share your voice and your music with others. My dad had a part-time radio broadcasting job when he was at uni, and some of his weather recordings are still used 20 + years later (or so he claims). Hopefully I inherited some of his deep soothing radio voice  There is no doubt that this will become a new fixation of mine. I have always enjoyed listening to radio, and listening to different talk shows and radio hosts. Each one has his/her own unique style that draws a selective group of daily listeners. I'm confident that in time I will find my own style and start gaining in listening numbers.

Return to the U.S.

With one more exam to go this term, my return to the U.S. is a mere 5 days away. I am excited to be returning after a 6 months absence from American soil.

At the moment, my family is currently residing in Las Vegas, or Sin City, as it were. I have only been there for a couple weeks in January when my family initially moved there. It is a city of grandeur, rampant with casinos, scantily-clad women, and an all-encompassing aroma of cigarettes. I rather enjoyed seeing the city for the first time. With that being said, after speaking with a large handful of people the general consensus is that the timeless city is better for taking a holiday as opposed to actually living there. I would think that the fast paced lifestyle and incessant superficiality takes a toll on a person after a few months. In general, I'd much rather prefer the slower paced, go-with-the-flow pace of life native to Europe.

Las Vegas aside, I have been craving Taco Bell for the past 6 months, and if I can't get any upon my return, there will be blood no doubt. England is severely lacking in Mexican restaurants, good cigars, and sunny weather--all of which can be instantly accessible at my fingertips when I return. Then again, 110 degrees Fahrenheit makes my sour cream skin tingle. Most importantly, I miss the easily accessible gym next to my residence. This term I have been slacking off and these next few weeks back home I am going to exhaust my body, without having to bother with coursework and assignments, and it will be wonderful.



Next stop....Vegas!

My Love

Her smile is a light greater than that of a thousand stars,

It warms the deep, icy caverns of my torn heart,

Her laugh is intoxicating,

I get drunk in love every time my earthly ears are graced

with its heavenly presence.


Her eyes are clairvoyant, haunting,

Cutting through my insides like a diamond saber.

She knows my biggest worries and fears,

And my longing for her love that matches my own,

Kiss for kiss, embrace for embrace.


When I look into her eyes time stops.

The rest of the world ceases to exist,

Like a little child in awe of a shiny coin,

I am entranced.


She is the missing piece in life's puzzle.